Day 36.5: I Suck At Cheating

Well, folks, guess I've converted to the light side. :-) I lost my good VeganDHA blend today, which will cost a small fortune to replace if I get that same brand. Fortunately, I have a number of things that can fill the void, since I've been actively supplementing since 2008, but still, it's annoying when you can't find your stuff. :-D

I sat through the review session before Wednesday's exam, getting vaguely annoyed with the fact that people kept on asking if something was going to be on the exam or not, like percentages of naturally-occurring isotopes and their specific atomic weights. If you were to memorize all those percentages for the 60-70 elements we have to learn for the test in an Introductory Chem class, please, teach me all your mad memorization skills, lol. :-D Anyhoo, I left feeling somewhat stressed out even though my questions were answered quite thoroughly.

It's easy when you're in the vicinity of half a dozen or so unhealthy restaurants, to want to partake. I mean, there are two within less than a mile of the college. But, for some reason the urge to partake just wasn't that overpowering. Sure, I was a bit peckish especially after my professor started using food in the chemical equations (those are actually fun problems but they make you hungry!), and a little stressed from all the business from earlier in the day, but honestly I didn't really want it that badly and went home to chill with some water and a few toasted almonds.

I have been corrupted. :-D

Normally, with unlimited funds and lack of willpower, I would have gotten the biggest thing of chicken nuggets on the menu at Chik-Fil-A and chowed down like there was no tomorrow. I would have not felt any buyer's remorse or anything, I would have been happy for the time being. I used to eat two meals a day from McD's at my heavier size (if you could call it a meal) and think nothing of it. Now, it just feels completely weird to me to even consider fast food or any food out in general. Even on my birthday Bryan and I will probably use the fundages Mom and Dad are giving us to eat out and go bowling instead or mini-golfing or something like that. :-) The weather is supposed to be nice so we may make some light dishes and go out to Castlewood for a picnic. Either way, my mom and dad's way of celebrating and our way is like night and day.

But, even though I suck at cheating, I like the person I am. I don't feel gross and crawl around the house all day, living from meal to meal. I don't get upset about not having money as much because it isn't really a huge necessity. You have no idea how bad your eating habits have gotten until you see your monthly bank statement and it's almost 100 percent restaurants! It has freed up a significant chunk of change. So has quitting soda, I paid $14 for my Tervis cup and I've been using it for a month just filling up wherever I needed to get water. :-) I found a soul jumbled up there in all those malfunctioning organs and fat folds, and I kinda like her. :-D

Anyhoo, I gotta get back to studying and doing some arm and ab/squat workouts! I hope everyone has a fantastic day and stays cool, cause it's a hot one. Be blessed!

Day 25.5: Demotivation Becomes Motivation

I have had a very... interesting day today, as in, really kind of blah. My mom was in the same mood I was but for a different reason, and when you add two people who want to kill everyone and especially each other in the same room, it does not bode well for either person. Mom was telling me about how I spend so much money and how they aren't going to pay for my overdrafts (Which really is not a huge deal, it was a glitch in the system and I will pay it off tomorrow after I get my paycheck. It was just the way she said it, she knows how to push all my buttons!) I don't consider myself to spend massively either. I just have things that come up that I need to take care of, like having some gym shorts and some deodorant, and I take care of them when they come up. There is a lot of stuff I want but I am still prudent. :-)

Anyway, my mom's words and my general bad mood apexed today when I went and tried to bike. I made it 2 miles (actually, closer to 1.76) and I just broke down. I'm sure I kind of surprised the guy next to me, but I got up and left, feeling completely defeated and just blah. I posted to my GOF page on Facebook, thinking everyone was going to knock me for it. What can I say, sometimes I can be a tad pessimistic. But I got a lot of encouragement from some great people, even some I didn't even know. I decided then that I am a lot of things sometimes, but a quitter is not one of them.

I got home just as my parents were leaving to go out of town and I was determined to attack my dad's stationary bike. He has a different type of bike than I'm used to using, I usually use a recumbent and he uses one that looks more like a regular bike. I got on and turned on the beauty hour on HSN, and proceeded to kick butt. I rode for about 40 minutes, and knocked out 10.3 miles out on the treadmill, beating my dad at both time and mileage. My dad and I have always been a bit competitive when it comes to the stationary bike. I am always trying to beat him, and now I have. I rode for a grand total of 12.06 miles. :-)

What is really sweet is that I have obliterated another mini-goal of mine which was to do my gym's requirement for biking for a short-track tri (10.2 miles), which I set kind of half-jokingly cause at that point I was much heavier and knew that it would be a bit of a long shot. Now I have not only met that goal but I have beaten it by 0.1 miles! That is completely awesome.

I am so glad for everyone's encouragement. :-) It is super awesome on a bad day like this. I get on my blog and write about it and I hope other people are encouraged by it too. Sometimes you just have a blah day. You can still get it done! Never settle and never give up. You're just one step away from a breakthrough!

I hope everyone has a fantastic evening. Me, I've got to get some chemistry homework done, because as far as I know, it has not done itself, lol. :-D Take care everyone!