Day 16.5: Signs You're Getting Thinner

- You are freezing everywhere you go. I live in my WFM jacket and it's 90 degrees outside!
- When you stare blankly for 20 minutes while everyone else is stuffing their face.
- When you go into a athletic store and people don't give you a second glance.
- When you fit into your favorite jacket at REI and still can go up a size if you want.
- When it sounds incredulous that someone gets tired going to the other size of the mall.
- When you'd rather go running than eat.
- When you're stressed, you say, "Dammit, I wanna run!"
- When you're excited when you find a free 5k.
- When you go exploring after being out all day.

These are just a few for fun that have happened throughout the day and week. I have been noticing little things in my life that haven't always been present. I fit into a large jacket at REI. When I was previously at REI at around 222 or so, the jacket was very loose through the sleeves but wouldn't zip up (I have big hips and a weird waist, lol) and this time it zipped up all the way. I was psyched and I hope by the time winter rolls around I will be a medium.

My family has yet to catch up with me weight-wise. In fact, my mom is kind of sabotaging me a little bit because she always wants to eat. I wanted to eat at a restaurant with lots of healthy options, but for some reason my mom thought the other end of the mall was too far, even though technically you can just get in the car and drive down there. My mom's idea of "shopping at the mall" means going to 2 shops in close proximity to each other, and one of them is always a Starbucks. Anyhoo, she went to basically a meat and cheese mecca (AKA El Maguey) and I tried to find something healthy on the menu, and I got what I thought was a healthy meal but turned out to be covered in cheese! Next time I go to the restaurant I will ask for it without cheese. Yuck. :-P

Still, it looks like I have broken the 216-217 plateau for now. I ran six continuous minutes on the treadmill and am aiming for seven or eight tomorrow. I like to aim a little higher and try to surpass it. My goal today was five minutes, but I'm trying to get to a 30-40 minute run. I intend to run the (FREE) 5K I have signed up for, even if I have to train in a hurry. And besides, running obliterates the pounds. :-)

Well, I hope everyone has a great night! Take care all.

Day 16: School Daze

Morning everyone!

Survived my first day of school yesterday. It was actually quite a bit less traumatic than I thought it would be, both psychologically and food-wise. I thought it was going to be a huge adjustment since I hadn't even thought about school for three or four months, but I seemed to fit right in and was able to take notes. I was also okay for eating, I only ate a little and got full fast.

I seem to be plateaued at 216 again. I really do need to step up my game a bit because I had a busy weekend and I think I tend to gain weight over the weekends. My fiancé and I are becoming more active though which is a great thing. We do a lot of walking and such and we will be doing a 5K later on in September. :-) It will be the second of that run that I have done, and my fiancé's first of this one, though we did the Race for the Cure last July. It is an untimed race but I hope to beat my PR this next year and even run it.

I also hope to run for five minutes continually soon. That is my next goal. I ran for about 3 minutes the other day and got a bit tired after that. I want to eventually get to the point where I'm running all 20 minutes. And then I will add more! I want to be able to run a 5K, and eventually a 10K. I have a very awesome friend that regularly runs marathons and did a few ultramarathons recently; I would love to do that. My ultimate goal is to do a full triathlon. My fantasy and not-very-realistic goal is to be able to do an Ironman tri someday, but I don't know if that will actually happen. But first, to do the 5-minute run, lol. :-)

Welp, it's to the gym with me, and then to hang out with my best friend. Have a great day all and enjoy the weather!

Day 14: One, Two, Skip A Few...

Hey guys!

I skipped a day or two since I have been busy! My fiancé and I spent the entire weekend together, we went to Castlewood and walked the mile trail. I got some angry spots on my feet and sand in my shoes but we had an awesome time. The next day we went out to eat and watched Courageous at home since my feet were still sore. By today my feet had healed up so we walked along the riverfront at Festival of the Little Hills. We had a great time and hung out at Picasso's as well, which is my favorite place to hang out on Main St besides Jake's on Main (AKA the Life is Good shop). We went there as well.

So, needless to say, the weekend has been very busy. And tomorrow I start school at college taking my very first class towards my Biology degree. I haven't decided if I want to go into Marine Biology or Microbiology yet, but either one sounds great to me. If I got a Microbiology degree I could work at Monsanto or a biopharmaceutical company, and if I was a Marine Biologist I could work at an aquarium or go sailing on the ocean. That sounds a lot more exciting than dealing with people, lol. I am by nature a researcher and not into customer service, so a type of degree where interaction with people would be minimal sounds utterly fantastic to me. :-D

Speaking of school, I'm not sure how it will go with food. I love the food at my college, which is mostly unhealthy stuff. They also have lots of events at the college with free food and drink (served in Frisbees, no less) and food trucks from time to time. So I will have to keep a tight reign on what goes into my mouth. Thankfully the BMR Bliss helps with the really wonky cravings (I don't usually eat sweets or really salty food) and keeps my appetite to a minimum.

I hope everyone has a great night! I will be nervous about school but I know all will be well.

Day 11: Cause I'm Awesome that Way.

Hi guys!

I appreciate your patronage! There have been 61 page views in two days! I am so happy that you are enjoying the site and I hope to see even more of you soon.

I have had a mixed bag of a day. On the positive side, I ran three consecutive miles without stopping. I haven't done that in my continuous running adventures, even when I was good at it. I ran a total of around 5-6 minutes, with 4 minutes of walking. Considering the circumstances, it's not a bad go of it. I'm planning on going back later on tonight if the gas in my car holds out for another day. :-) Also, I weighed in at 215.2 today, breaking the plateau at 217-219. When I compare side by side pictures I can truly tell a difference. Check out this bad boy:

 



I can really tell a difference! That is the same shirt too, and yes I bash on the Cubs and don't particularly like them or baseball in general but my parents keep on buying me shirts when they go to Chicago. My dad is a huge Cubs fan. And we're in St Louis. Awesome planning there, but my dad is from the UK so he has that excuse.

 

I have also had some not-so-good news in that someone I have trusted in the past has been lying to me constantly, and tries to pass the buck to me and say that I don't understand what's going on. And today I unearthed a huge honker of a lie that this person told me that could have cost me a ton of time, hassle, and kept me bound to them for the rest of my life. I won't get into the particulars, those who are close to me know exactly what I am talking about, but I am honestly shocked. I don't understand how someone who is supposed to be close to you lies to your face and then blames you for not understanding why they lied and how the whole schema works.

 

Anyhoo, I have also received a call from a college that may work with me to find a place to live and transfer some of my college credits at my current college to theirs. I didn't realize they had been calling me because they never left voicemails until today, and I had wondered where they had been all this time. Either way, I have not decided if I will switch my major at my current college or transfer to this college. It's a huge decision and I want to make sure I'm making the right one. :-)

 

Talk about a drama filled day, right?? I hope everyone else has a less drama-filled day and enjoys their day.

Day 10: I did it!

Today has been a good day. I stepped on the scale this morning and was happy to see I was at exactly 216, which is 15 lbs gone FINALLY. I have been hovering around 217-219 for awhile and now I'm so excited to finally see 216. I have not been 216 since living at my fiancé's house over a year ago.

I have also started running at the gym. I have joked in the past that you could get me to run by stealing my box of donuts and driving off with it, and I would run after you trying to get them back, but I am no longer ravenous for chocolate donuts or anything like that. In fact, I went to Steak and Shake with my best friend and literally could not finish a $3 meal. WTF? When I went to Steak and Shake before, I would eat the entire meal AND get ice cream afterwards AND possibly a bag of candy later. I just can't imagine doing that these days. I would feel completely gross. :-P

Ever since I changed my lifestyle, my world has totally changed. It's like I can't imagine doing the things I used to do, at least not favorably. Clothes are starting to fit in sizes I haven't worn before. I actually am taking an interest in clothes and other things. I even put on some makeup, which is something I don't normally do. :-) My whole life has changed for the better, and it just keeps getting better.

My fiancé finished his last quarter of culinary school today! He is going on to an externship at a really fancy restaurant, and I am one proud fiancée. He still loves his job after being there at least three months (he was shadowing there and now he is an extern) and is learning the menu quite well. I will be doing my first practicum in veterinary technology next semester, and I couldn't be more excited. I loved working as a groomer, and I assume this will be similar. :-)

I hope everyone has a great day!

Day Nine: Actual Next Day!! Mind is BLOWN.

Hi everyone, 11 page views today? Man you are all amazing. :-)

I finally got on after one day, so technically this is day nine!
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I went to yoga class this morning, reluctantly. I have not been to an exercise class in ages, and generally speaking I don't like them. I'm always the token fat chick in the class; sweating, not in proper workout clothes, and just somewhat of a spectacle to myself and others. So, needless to say, I generally avoid them like the plague. But today, I decided to be different. I got in, and true to form I was the sweaty fat chick (but there was an old guy in my class who was borderline flashing his backside on the bending moves, so I felt better, lol) but I felt different this time.

Sure, I was screaming inside my head, things I prefer not to repeat, but I feel like I made the right decision trying to take care of my body. Ever since I took some serious steps towards reevaluating my life, I'm starting to realize that without exception that everyone starts out that way. They might not be as heavy as I was and am, but they feel out of place, like the token something-or-another. They feel like everyone is staring at them and judging them when in reality everyone feels the same way about the way they look and could care less what you look like. In fact, I saw someone more overweight than me totally killing it on the elliptical and my immediate thought was, "Get it girl!" I was so psyched to see her kicking ass like that. :-)

I found something kind of cool today when I was taking my supplements this morning. I noticed on the bottom of the 1st Phorm container that holds the Thyro-Drive I take every morning there is printed in script, "Never Settle." I had never noticed it before and thought it was super cool. As I fought my usual inertia, I kept repeating these words to myself, "Never settle." And I think that after some evaluation of my own life there is some truth and motivation in that phrase.

I have settled my whole life. For crappy jobs, abusive family members and boyfriends, for programs in school I didn't enjoy in the slightest, for being unkempt and overweight my whole life. I was always saying "Yes," to someone or something without considering my own opinion. I just continually let myself go without considering that I could take my life in another direction. Maybe today I can decide for once not to settle and to say "Yes," to myself.

Didn't think you would get poetic turn of phrase, didya? Well luckily, today you did. I hope you all have a great day and remember not to settle!

Day Eight: Stay Positive

I have been inactive for more than a day, but I promise to update this more frequently (and actually do it everyday!)

I quit my job yesterday. I had only been there for six weeks but it was probably one of the most demeaning jobs I have ever had. I got yelled at, got nasty garbage spilled on me daily, and got all kinds of crap from everyone. I was so glad to see it go. But I do have to find another job in the meantime since I have tuition for school and whatnot. :-) I do have enough of a paycheck coming in to pay for the rest of my degree, but I'm still a bit nervous. I'm confident though in my ability to find another job.

While searching for another job, I have decided to work on myself. I have been visiting S2 for about a month now and totally love the BMR Bliss Go Pack. I finally broke my plateau and got below 217.2, which I'm sure is due in part to relieving myself of some really difficult stressors (my job being one of them!). My mom has brought on the drama lately, and I find that working out has relieved a lot of that tension. Today I signed up for yoga classes and may start Zumba soon if my knees will tolerate it. I start my yoga classes tomorrow at 10:15am. :-) I will be sure to keep ya'll updated. :-)

I have also been going to vet tech school at Penn Foster, which I know is a for-profit school, but my fiancé has had a wonderful time with his college education and is about to graduate with a cooking certificate from a for-profit school, and I'm so stinking proud! I am doing my vet tech degree and will be doing another degree with them when I'm done with this one. It'll be a surprise. :-)

Keep you updated on my progress. :)