I am sorry I haven't been posting on here for awhile. I have two blogs and I generally tend to focus on one and not the other sometimes. :-)
It has been hard for the past few days. I am sure I have run the gamut already so I don't want to get into it for now, but I have felt numb, lost, and alone. I have suffered from intermittent depression my whole life and I guess it's just been a rough spell for me. I wish I had something more optimistic to say but I'm just not feeling it tonight. That's okay though, I know God takes care of me and something good will come out of it. That I do know for sure.
I registered for classes today, General Biology I and Ethics. I took the Ethics class last year but had similar issues to right now and I had to drop out. I am taking it again because I love philosophy, and wanted to absorb the whole class and really enjoy it. I am taking it from the same professor, and am seriously looking forward to it. Since I am no longer in the medical field, that course will fulfill a literature credit. :-) Besides, I enjoy reading about Greek and Roman philosophers even though most of them are Atheists. I also love Greek mythology. :-) Too bad I will never use it, lol.
I need to get back into the writing one of these days. You know you're going through writing withdrawal when your characters appear to you in dreams and ask you why you're not writing anymore, lol. I have been writing and telling stories pretty much my whole life, especially the Fort Cyprus Bysto series which I have written intermittently since 1999. I also had a series of books called Red Rivers, Redemption, and a third unnamed book which I usually call Renewal or Restart. Those are strongly autobiographical but more exaggerated than my actual life. I don't write super often because once I get started I want to write ALL. THE. TIME. and I can't afford to do that, lol! :-D One of these days I will share some more about Fort Cyprus Bysto and my characters. :-)
Also, my school is putting on a Veterans Week which I will be at religiously. I am not a Veteran, nor do I know too many military vets, but I can relate to them because of a high incidence of post-traumatic stress disorder, which I had in early adulthood and for a little while 3 years ago (it has since gone away) and I can't compare my trauma to that of the military vets, but somehow I feel a camaraderie there and I will always support military vets and those currently serving. :-)
Lots of different topics tonight, but it feels good to talk about something different for a change. :-) I hope I will be able to elaborate on this blog somewhat, I have missed posting here and sharing with all of you. I hope all of you have a fantastic evening, I am delving into chemistry land and hopefully I'll still be balanced on the other side. Ha ha, chemistry humor. :-D Be blessed and enjoy the journey.
Showing posts with label God. Show all posts
Showing posts with label God. Show all posts
Sunday, November 3, 2013
Thursday, October 17, 2013
Day 73: Keeping it Amazing
It has been an awesome day. :-)
I found out today that my mom will continue to fund my education after way too many years in college. I've finally found my niche in Chemistry/Biology and enjoy every day that I'm there. I was shocked, because for awhile I thought she wasn't really that interested in my going to school, but my mom's and my relationship has been growing by leaps and bounds every day. I am continually amazed at my mom's positive attitude. She hasn't really had an easy time of it with my grandpa being ill, but she is there almost every weekend and takes care of him. :-) My mom is such an amazing, strong person and I feel blessed to know her. My dad too! He's funny and way smarter than me, lol. :-)
I went for a short run today. I intended to break records today, and I felt God telling me to put away the timer for the run. I was not keen on this at all, I have always run with a timer and it is super glued into my hand most of the run. I finally decided to heed the feeling and put the timer away, only to discover when I took it out a minute later that I had accidently deleted my running apps from my phone! What are the odds? I was even more frustrated and ticked, but I went with my instinct for how far to run and when to stop. And I still had a good run even without the timer. In fact, it felt so good I think I will be running "naked" from now on.
Not to worry, I won't be running without clothes on! To run "naked" means not to track time, calories, or any kind of distance. You simply run until you feel like stopping, and walk some, and run some. I liked the freedom of running without a timer, there was no sense of failure because I hadn't accomplished my 30 minute distance that has been eluding me for weeks. I enjoyed being outside, enjoyed the weather, and just relaxed. :-)
My fiancé is coming over Saturday to see me! I have missed him since he started work. He seems to be having a great time at his new job, but he still misses me a lot. I miss him too! I keep hoping for a job with relatively flexible hours so when we get married in a year that I will actually be able to see him. :-) I'm still keen on being a Beachbody coach, lol! Maybe someday. ;-)
I hope everyone has a fantastic evening! I will be buried in Chemistry homework land as usual. Be blessed and enjoy the journey!
I found out today that my mom will continue to fund my education after way too many years in college. I've finally found my niche in Chemistry/Biology and enjoy every day that I'm there. I was shocked, because for awhile I thought she wasn't really that interested in my going to school, but my mom's and my relationship has been growing by leaps and bounds every day. I am continually amazed at my mom's positive attitude. She hasn't really had an easy time of it with my grandpa being ill, but she is there almost every weekend and takes care of him. :-) My mom is such an amazing, strong person and I feel blessed to know her. My dad too! He's funny and way smarter than me, lol. :-)
I went for a short run today. I intended to break records today, and I felt God telling me to put away the timer for the run. I was not keen on this at all, I have always run with a timer and it is super glued into my hand most of the run. I finally decided to heed the feeling and put the timer away, only to discover when I took it out a minute later that I had accidently deleted my running apps from my phone! What are the odds? I was even more frustrated and ticked, but I went with my instinct for how far to run and when to stop. And I still had a good run even without the timer. In fact, it felt so good I think I will be running "naked" from now on.
Not to worry, I won't be running without clothes on! To run "naked" means not to track time, calories, or any kind of distance. You simply run until you feel like stopping, and walk some, and run some. I liked the freedom of running without a timer, there was no sense of failure because I hadn't accomplished my 30 minute distance that has been eluding me for weeks. I enjoyed being outside, enjoyed the weather, and just relaxed. :-)
My fiancé is coming over Saturday to see me! I have missed him since he started work. He seems to be having a great time at his new job, but he still misses me a lot. I miss him too! I keep hoping for a job with relatively flexible hours so when we get married in a year that I will actually be able to see him. :-) I'm still keen on being a Beachbody coach, lol! Maybe someday. ;-)
I hope everyone has a fantastic evening! I will be buried in Chemistry homework land as usual. Be blessed and enjoy the journey!
Sunday, September 8, 2013
Day 35: I Learned About Never Settling
No weird dreams after movie night. I'd say this is a pretty good thing. Next up for Bryan and I is introducing the loveliness that is the Star Wars trilogy. :-)
I have learned some interesting things about what constitutes settling to some folks. For some, it's simply that I'm not settling because I don't work at <insert previous job here>. I am settling because I didn't work to my full potential. As I see it, there's a lot of misperception about what this phrase means, and what it means to me.
Settling, as it stands, is directly seeing your goals and the potential to do great things, but consciously turning away and getting on with your bad decisions. Everything that comes up that is a game-changer is combated with excuses, self-doubt, and self-sabotage.
I have a person in my face-to-face life who is like this. This person has something good happen to them and immediately tries to downplay it or find some way to guarantee it won't work. They have been stuck in the same rut for a loooong time and don't really want to do anything about it. They have simply acknowledged that the suck in their life is the suck in their life and they have made their bed with the suck, never acknowledging that they have the power to change it.
That, my friends, is settling.
I have had this same problem in my own life in the past. I had some really good things going for me, and I would always break down and self-sabotage my efforts, simply because I was scared of being successful. Not because of deep-set issues (though anyone who has read this blog for more than one entry can tell you I have a few of those! ;-) ) but simply because it was the unknown and I knew I would have to work hard to get it.
I changed my life because it had just gotten to the point where I either had to change or end up another suicide statistic, because it was really that bad. God has a way of lifting you up when you get to such a desolate point in your life that you acknowledge that you can't do anything without him. He allows you the potential to do great things, until you realize that it was there all along for the taking. :-)
Deep musings this morning, eh? This has been on my mind for some time. I am taking a rest day today for the first time in 23 days and I don't consider this settling at all. I consider it honoring my body. I have been an off- and on-again Buddhist (and Christian, I tend to radiate infrequently between the two) for many years and that is a very important part of Buddhist philosophy, practicing compassion for yourself and others. So if I sound philosophical with Buddhist tendencies, there's a reason for that! :-)
Anyhoo, I will probably go out and dither for a bit, I'm meeting my best friend for lunch and mall-hopping today. There's a soup place in the mall that I want to try, so hopefully I will be able to try it out. I hope everyone has a fantastic day! :-)
I have learned some interesting things about what constitutes settling to some folks. For some, it's simply that I'm not settling because I don't work at <insert previous job here>. I am settling because I didn't work to my full potential. As I see it, there's a lot of misperception about what this phrase means, and what it means to me.
Settling, as it stands, is directly seeing your goals and the potential to do great things, but consciously turning away and getting on with your bad decisions. Everything that comes up that is a game-changer is combated with excuses, self-doubt, and self-sabotage.
I have a person in my face-to-face life who is like this. This person has something good happen to them and immediately tries to downplay it or find some way to guarantee it won't work. They have been stuck in the same rut for a loooong time and don't really want to do anything about it. They have simply acknowledged that the suck in their life is the suck in their life and they have made their bed with the suck, never acknowledging that they have the power to change it.
That, my friends, is settling.
I have had this same problem in my own life in the past. I had some really good things going for me, and I would always break down and self-sabotage my efforts, simply because I was scared of being successful. Not because of deep-set issues (though anyone who has read this blog for more than one entry can tell you I have a few of those! ;-) ) but simply because it was the unknown and I knew I would have to work hard to get it.
I changed my life because it had just gotten to the point where I either had to change or end up another suicide statistic, because it was really that bad. God has a way of lifting you up when you get to such a desolate point in your life that you acknowledge that you can't do anything without him. He allows you the potential to do great things, until you realize that it was there all along for the taking. :-)
Deep musings this morning, eh? This has been on my mind for some time. I am taking a rest day today for the first time in 23 days and I don't consider this settling at all. I consider it honoring my body. I have been an off- and on-again Buddhist (and Christian, I tend to radiate infrequently between the two) for many years and that is a very important part of Buddhist philosophy, practicing compassion for yourself and others. So if I sound philosophical with Buddhist tendencies, there's a reason for that! :-)
Anyhoo, I will probably go out and dither for a bit, I'm meeting my best friend for lunch and mall-hopping today. There's a soup place in the mall that I want to try, so hopefully I will be able to try it out. I hope everyone has a fantastic day! :-)
Friday, August 30, 2013
Day 26: Trying to Adjust
The last few days have been really intense, with tons of roller coaster emotions and just not fun. I'm trying not to drown the blog in pessimism cause that's not really what I'm all about, but I just feel really discouraged. I'm still working out, still not eating too much, but I just start to wonder if maybe I'm wasting my time and money going to school and doing all these things to better myself. I feel like I'll never be good enough to meet my expectations, no matter how hard I work. I have felt this way all my life, I work and work and still don't feel good enough for myself. I got a 4.0 GPA my first semester and I have a 4.0 GPA this semester. But I'm beating myself up because I got a 98 instead of a 100 on a quiz! :-P I know I shouldn't do this to myself, that I should accept myself as I am. But I've got it in my head that I accept myself as I am, I am being complacent and that will cause me to backslide. Do any of you feel that way? How do you deal with it?
I have been trying to work myself back up to 22 minutes and got a little further, to about 17 minutes before I felt another crying fit coming on. Fortunately, this time I waited till I got into the car. Since it has been two times in a row now, I wonder if its not PMS but something a little deeper. I have lost 21 lbs in 2 months, I have worked myself into the ground and gotten the reward for it. But it is still a shock to the system! I have never been this active or in better shape, and there seems to be this huge adjustment curve involved. This is the first time in my life that I have really treated myself well or honored myself. I have from a young age thought very badly of myself and not treated myself well. To actually do that for myself, to actually believe that I do matter and that I am doing the best I can, is such a hard pill to swallow, especially when it seems that the people who are closest to you want to sabotage you and make sure you fail! (Not people like my fiancé though, he has supported me through all the things the haters have dished out.)
I know I am going to get through this and come out stronger. I have never quit even through sexual abuse, financial disasters, and depression, but it is still hard! I would love any prayers that you can give me! :-)
I think I am going to do some serious chilling, and suck it up and have a rest day. It is so hard to give myself a rest day but I know I need some time to recharge and rejuvenate after working out continuously for way too many days! I just want to sit around, read Glamour, and paint my nails. I haven't done that in a long time. :-)
I hope everyone has a great day. If you're in the same boat as me, please pray for me and let me know any ways I can pray for you! :-)
I have been trying to work myself back up to 22 minutes and got a little further, to about 17 minutes before I felt another crying fit coming on. Fortunately, this time I waited till I got into the car. Since it has been two times in a row now, I wonder if its not PMS but something a little deeper. I have lost 21 lbs in 2 months, I have worked myself into the ground and gotten the reward for it. But it is still a shock to the system! I have never been this active or in better shape, and there seems to be this huge adjustment curve involved. This is the first time in my life that I have really treated myself well or honored myself. I have from a young age thought very badly of myself and not treated myself well. To actually do that for myself, to actually believe that I do matter and that I am doing the best I can, is such a hard pill to swallow, especially when it seems that the people who are closest to you want to sabotage you and make sure you fail! (Not people like my fiancé though, he has supported me through all the things the haters have dished out.)
I know I am going to get through this and come out stronger. I have never quit even through sexual abuse, financial disasters, and depression, but it is still hard! I would love any prayers that you can give me! :-)
I think I am going to do some serious chilling, and suck it up and have a rest day. It is so hard to give myself a rest day but I know I need some time to recharge and rejuvenate after working out continuously for way too many days! I just want to sit around, read Glamour, and paint my nails. I haven't done that in a long time. :-)
I hope everyone has a great day. If you're in the same boat as me, please pray for me and let me know any ways I can pray for you! :-)
Wednesday, August 28, 2013
Day 24: Praise You While I'm Sore
My ankle is injured! No bueno. I don't exactly know what happened except that it is bruised, and does not respond well to walking. It does better when I run instead of walk (I guess cause I tend to land more on my heel when I walk and more on the ball of my foot when I run!) but I'm not going to be dumb and try to pound out a 24-minute run today. I ran for about 10 minutes, which is about half of what I'm used to running. I am going to do some cardio/strength combos tonight that don't directly involve my ankle so I'm going to do those at full strength. Today is legs/thighs/chest/butt day which really sucks when you're an active runner and biker! But I persist because I love the way my calves look! They are shapely and beautiful. :-)
I lost 2 lbs today, but the gym scale has been recalibrated to weight what my mom's scale does! It would normally weigh me at 210 because of the way it was calibrated yesterday but today it weighed me at the exact same weight! I was totally bummed out, but hopefully it will be at 20 lbs tomorrow. I am so ridiculously close it's crazy! I'm around 18-19 lbs lost, which is great but I can totally get past that! Because of my persistence I have shattered several plateaus and if I get down to 212.0 on my mom's scale I have completely obliterated the whole plateau and the 5-6 lb cycle I have been doing for weeks now. So I am hoping for another whoooooosh. :-)
I am so excited about how my life is going, despite the few minor setbacks I described above. I remember a few weeks ago pondering life as a Christian and wondering if Joyce Meyer was right, that God would give me a better life if I loved him. Looking back, saying YES to Jesus was one of the best decisions I have ever made! I am amazed at how my life continues to change for the positive.
I love being back at church and serving God in different ways. I'm going to help serve at a mission project which involves filling bags with rice, protein, and vegetables for those in need in Haiti. We are going to fill ~40,000 bags of rice mix and they will be shipped to Haiti! There is also this whole missions weekend and I am definitely going! Because of school and the way my schedule is set up it is very difficult for me to go overseas, but I hear there are some local projects that will be available. I love volunteer work of all sorts, so helping in this field sounds fantastic to me. I am also attending a class that the church is offering in September about the privileges of being a church member. I'm so excited about all of this.
I hope everyone has a fantastic day and knocks out some good exercise. If you're injured like me, be smart and take it easy. Never settle for getting hurt worse. Be blessed all!
I lost 2 lbs today, but the gym scale has been recalibrated to weight what my mom's scale does! It would normally weigh me at 210 because of the way it was calibrated yesterday but today it weighed me at the exact same weight! I was totally bummed out, but hopefully it will be at 20 lbs tomorrow. I am so ridiculously close it's crazy! I'm around 18-19 lbs lost, which is great but I can totally get past that! Because of my persistence I have shattered several plateaus and if I get down to 212.0 on my mom's scale I have completely obliterated the whole plateau and the 5-6 lb cycle I have been doing for weeks now. So I am hoping for another whoooooosh. :-)
I am so excited about how my life is going, despite the few minor setbacks I described above. I remember a few weeks ago pondering life as a Christian and wondering if Joyce Meyer was right, that God would give me a better life if I loved him. Looking back, saying YES to Jesus was one of the best decisions I have ever made! I am amazed at how my life continues to change for the positive.
I love being back at church and serving God in different ways. I'm going to help serve at a mission project which involves filling bags with rice, protein, and vegetables for those in need in Haiti. We are going to fill ~40,000 bags of rice mix and they will be shipped to Haiti! There is also this whole missions weekend and I am definitely going! Because of school and the way my schedule is set up it is very difficult for me to go overseas, but I hear there are some local projects that will be available. I love volunteer work of all sorts, so helping in this field sounds fantastic to me. I am also attending a class that the church is offering in September about the privileges of being a church member. I'm so excited about all of this.
I hope everyone has a fantastic day and knocks out some good exercise. If you're injured like me, be smart and take it easy. Never settle for getting hurt worse. Be blessed all!
Sunday, August 25, 2013
Day 21: Lucky Treadmills and Blessed Sundays
I ran 21 minutes on what I have now figured out is my "unlucky" treadmill. I usually use the brand new treadmill that my gym has because it's my favorite. I can go 20 minutes plus at 3.2 mph. Today that treadmill was taken and there was an insane amount of people in the gym for it being a Sunday, so I decided to suck it up and go on the little-bitty treadmill adjacent to the door. It was a dinky thing and wouldn't have allowed me to stick my arms at my sides if I was any wider. And man... I couldn't even get above 3.0, was sweating profusely and grabbing the side bars some of the time (I hate doing that... it's wimpy running, lol!). Next time, I'm using my lucky treadmill and knocking out 22 minutes! :-)
I also went to church for the first time in six months to a year. Before, I am ashamed to say I had ulterior motives for going to church, but now I go cause I like the people there and totally enjoy the church's minister. He shouts a lot and is very interesting to listen to. Today he spoke on joy, and how we have joy through having a relationship with Christ and how sometimes things may be rough but Christ wins in the end, citing extensive passages from Revelation. I always thought Revelation was super cool, with Christ riding in on a white horse to save the world. I don't know how literal Revelation is but I think it would be super cool to see Jesus ride in on a white horse and banish Satan to the Lake of Fire. God sure does know how to write an awesome epic. :-D
Tonight I'm going to a potluck supper at the church. I don't have any food for it, but I am looking forward to fellowshipping and getting to know some of the people at my church. I know some of the people in my Sunday School classes, I know the people I sit with on the right side of the church, and I know the associate pastor and music minister, but potlucks are fun because you get to know a variety of people. I just have to, as my 11th grade Geometry teacher often said when we left, make good choices! Eat less and fellowship more. Should be interesting to put my social and eating skills to the test, lol.
Well, I've got to get back to chemistry homework, which was what I got online to do to begin with! :-D I hope everyone has a blessed day and I will see you guys tomorrow! :-)
I also went to church for the first time in six months to a year. Before, I am ashamed to say I had ulterior motives for going to church, but now I go cause I like the people there and totally enjoy the church's minister. He shouts a lot and is very interesting to listen to. Today he spoke on joy, and how we have joy through having a relationship with Christ and how sometimes things may be rough but Christ wins in the end, citing extensive passages from Revelation. I always thought Revelation was super cool, with Christ riding in on a white horse to save the world. I don't know how literal Revelation is but I think it would be super cool to see Jesus ride in on a white horse and banish Satan to the Lake of Fire. God sure does know how to write an awesome epic. :-D
Tonight I'm going to a potluck supper at the church. I don't have any food for it, but I am looking forward to fellowshipping and getting to know some of the people at my church. I know some of the people in my Sunday School classes, I know the people I sit with on the right side of the church, and I know the associate pastor and music minister, but potlucks are fun because you get to know a variety of people. I just have to, as my 11th grade Geometry teacher often said when we left, make good choices! Eat less and fellowship more. Should be interesting to put my social and eating skills to the test, lol.
Well, I've got to get back to chemistry homework, which was what I got online to do to begin with! :-D I hope everyone has a blessed day and I will see you guys tomorrow! :-)
Saturday, August 24, 2013
Day 20: 20th Day, 20 minutes!!
I'm so ridiculously psyched. I just ran for the "elusive" 20 minutes and for my first mile! Well, technically a mile and a tenth, but who's counting, right? :-D
My day started out kind of sucky. I have been doing things right but since I got off antidepressants I am ridiculously stuck at 217 again. I just think I will be at this weight for awhile, until my body gets used to being off antidepressants. Either way, to see the same number on the scale everyday is super frustrating! I reluctantly went running, still a bit upset from the scale number. I listen to Christian radio a lot of the time on the way to my run, and Third Day's "I Need a Miracle" came on. I said to God, kind of flippantly, "A miracle would be good." I was just being silly, but God gave me some amazing things to be thankful for. I'll share some with you:
1) I can see! (And just getting new specs, you really appreciate being able to see.)
2) I can hear moderately well.
3) I can walk.
4) I can run like nobody's business.
5) I have good things to eat.
6) I have clean water and will not get sick if I drink tons of it.
7) I am doing well at college.
And the list goes on... but my spirits were incredibly lifted. I felt energized and happy and I knocked out 20 minutes on the treadmill! God is good.
Oh, speaking of new specs, here is a photo of me with said new specs:
My day started out kind of sucky. I have been doing things right but since I got off antidepressants I am ridiculously stuck at 217 again. I just think I will be at this weight for awhile, until my body gets used to being off antidepressants. Either way, to see the same number on the scale everyday is super frustrating! I reluctantly went running, still a bit upset from the scale number. I listen to Christian radio a lot of the time on the way to my run, and Third Day's "I Need a Miracle" came on. I said to God, kind of flippantly, "A miracle would be good." I was just being silly, but God gave me some amazing things to be thankful for. I'll share some with you:
1) I can see! (And just getting new specs, you really appreciate being able to see.)
2) I can hear moderately well.
3) I can walk.
4) I can run like nobody's business.
5) I have good things to eat.
6) I have clean water and will not get sick if I drink tons of it.
7) I am doing well at college.
And the list goes on... but my spirits were incredibly lifted. I felt energized and happy and I knocked out 20 minutes on the treadmill! God is good.
Oh, speaking of new specs, here is a photo of me with said new specs:
I totally love them! They make me look so stinkin' cute. And I had to wait 4 days to get them so I'm very grateful to have them. I'm also grateful because my original glasses broke 3 months ago and I wasn't able to replace them. I wore a pair that I wore when I was 15 and I couldn't see very well AT ALL. So now my scrip is the intended power and I can see just fine. (By the way, excuse the lack of makeup and the post-workout hair. I had just done a workout and when you sweat profusely, makeup is a bad idea!)
I hope everyone has a fantastic day. I know I will. God bless!
Friday, August 23, 2013
Day 19: Ch-ch-changes
First of all, love that song! :-)
I have been noticing some changes. Today I ran 15 consecutive minutes and was actually running longer than anyone else in the gym! They were doing running/walking intervals and I was powering away on that run like a total beast. That felt so awesome. I used to be the chica not even going above 3.0 on the treadmill. I watched everyone else run and I wanted to do it so bad. Now, I'm slower than them but leaving them in the dust as far as time.
I have been opening my mind to religion as well. I have not had good experiences with churches because I am SO different than most of the people there, I am very matter-of-fact and I ask a lot of questions which sometimes gets on people's nerves. Besides, I have struggled with a number of sins in the past that are too personal to share and I was always embarrassed to come to church because I was afraid someone would find out and be judgmental towards me. Because of that, I built up walls and pushed people away in church so they wouldn't see my sins. Silly logic, I know, but when you're scared you do some dumb stuff.
I have a Joyce Meyer obsession. I have mentioned it in previous entries and it still holds true. I'm not like hanging out in Fenton trying to find her or anything, but I do watch her show every morning and read some of her books. There is this series she has done that literally took 3 times before I could watch it all the way through because it was so hard to wrap my head around. It was about deception and compromise, a very meaty sermon indeed. That wasn't really the part that got me. She says towards the end of the first part of the sermon, "Listen, God can give you a better life than the one you're living now." It's ironic, because right now I think I have a great life and an awesome thing going for me. I thought, "I could have an even better life WITH God? I have a great life now, and that must mean with God it will be even more awesome!" Naivety, yes, but get over it. We all have our catalysts.
So, with that in mind I am putting a different bend on this website. Since Vegan365 is going the way of the dodo bird (sorry, all of you that are fans, it is going down later this afternoon), I am changing the name of the site. It will be called: Girl on Fire: From Underdog to Beastmode. I'm so excited about the name change and the lifestyle change and I'm excited to share it with you!
I hope all of you have a blessed day and enjoy life!
I have been noticing some changes. Today I ran 15 consecutive minutes and was actually running longer than anyone else in the gym! They were doing running/walking intervals and I was powering away on that run like a total beast. That felt so awesome. I used to be the chica not even going above 3.0 on the treadmill. I watched everyone else run and I wanted to do it so bad. Now, I'm slower than them but leaving them in the dust as far as time.
I have been opening my mind to religion as well. I have not had good experiences with churches because I am SO different than most of the people there, I am very matter-of-fact and I ask a lot of questions which sometimes gets on people's nerves. Besides, I have struggled with a number of sins in the past that are too personal to share and I was always embarrassed to come to church because I was afraid someone would find out and be judgmental towards me. Because of that, I built up walls and pushed people away in church so they wouldn't see my sins. Silly logic, I know, but when you're scared you do some dumb stuff.
I have a Joyce Meyer obsession. I have mentioned it in previous entries and it still holds true. I'm not like hanging out in Fenton trying to find her or anything, but I do watch her show every morning and read some of her books. There is this series she has done that literally took 3 times before I could watch it all the way through because it was so hard to wrap my head around. It was about deception and compromise, a very meaty sermon indeed. That wasn't really the part that got me. She says towards the end of the first part of the sermon, "Listen, God can give you a better life than the one you're living now." It's ironic, because right now I think I have a great life and an awesome thing going for me. I thought, "I could have an even better life WITH God? I have a great life now, and that must mean with God it will be even more awesome!" Naivety, yes, but get over it. We all have our catalysts.
So, with that in mind I am putting a different bend on this website. Since Vegan365 is going the way of the dodo bird (sorry, all of you that are fans, it is going down later this afternoon), I am changing the name of the site. It will be called: Girl on Fire: From Underdog to Beastmode. I'm so excited about the name change and the lifestyle change and I'm excited to share it with you!
I hope all of you have a blessed day and enjoy life!
Wednesday, August 21, 2013
Day 17: Girl on Fire
I can't believe it! I blasted through my plateau today and weighed in at 213.6. At my lowest I was around 214.8 so I am both shocked and pleased. Let me tell you though, I only weighed once! :-D
I also have been running like crazy for the past few days. I started out doing running and walking, about 10 minutes or so, then I did it for 3 consecutive minutes, then 6, and today I ran for 10 consecutive minutes (and 2 seconds). My goal is eventually to get to where I'm running 30-40 minutes at a time and am able to strength train along with it. Cause honestly, when I get done running I don't want to do anything else right away. That is why generally I run in the morning and strength train at night. :-)
I have been watching a lot of inspirational videos lately. Not my traditional Joyce Meyer obsession (she is an amazing speaker, the jury is still out as to whether I believe in God or not but I do enjoy learning about Christianity) but some weight loss videos on YouTube. My favorite is this one here which I believe has a website that you can access from the page. I have always enjoyed watching Before and After videos, and this chica is completely relatable. A lot of the folks on YouTube are older and have kids or grandkids and want to lose weight for them, so its nice to see someone younger on there as well. :-)
I am going in to see a career counselor on Tuesday to see if she can set me up with a job, preferably something that utilizes my Technical Writing degree. Yup, I have a BA in Technical Writing but as of yet have been unable to use it except for my occasional contributions to the Examiner and a brief contract job for a museum. I did insurance for a time but I have learned I don't like customer service. And cold calling is horrible! You get hung up on, sworn at, insulted, and all kinds of fun stuff. So, hopefully I can find something that suits me and uses my degree. Wish me luck! :-)
Well, that is all for now, gotta get ready for school. Have a great day all! :-)
I also have been running like crazy for the past few days. I started out doing running and walking, about 10 minutes or so, then I did it for 3 consecutive minutes, then 6, and today I ran for 10 consecutive minutes (and 2 seconds). My goal is eventually to get to where I'm running 30-40 minutes at a time and am able to strength train along with it. Cause honestly, when I get done running I don't want to do anything else right away. That is why generally I run in the morning and strength train at night. :-)
I have been watching a lot of inspirational videos lately. Not my traditional Joyce Meyer obsession (she is an amazing speaker, the jury is still out as to whether I believe in God or not but I do enjoy learning about Christianity) but some weight loss videos on YouTube. My favorite is this one here which I believe has a website that you can access from the page. I have always enjoyed watching Before and After videos, and this chica is completely relatable. A lot of the folks on YouTube are older and have kids or grandkids and want to lose weight for them, so its nice to see someone younger on there as well. :-)
I am going in to see a career counselor on Tuesday to see if she can set me up with a job, preferably something that utilizes my Technical Writing degree. Yup, I have a BA in Technical Writing but as of yet have been unable to use it except for my occasional contributions to the Examiner and a brief contract job for a museum. I did insurance for a time but I have learned I don't like customer service. And cold calling is horrible! You get hung up on, sworn at, insulted, and all kinds of fun stuff. So, hopefully I can find something that suits me and uses my degree. Wish me luck! :-)
Well, that is all for now, gotta get ready for school. Have a great day all! :-)
Tuesday, July 30, 2013
Day Seven: Down (Almost) Fifteen Pounds!
Yeah, I know it hasn't technically been seven days, but with work and the other blog I have been struggling to keep up with this blog as well. Still, I will definitely try to keep working on posts on this site whenever I can.
I can't believe that I am almost down 15 pounds since starting the BMR Bliss Pack. I am very glad to have some weight off, even though most of it has been just from not eating and working all day. I definitely love my job 99.99 percent of the time but sometimes it just gets on my nerves, lol. Last night was interesting because there were only two of us and my co-worker was off hiding somewhere and there was often a 5-or-6 customer line. Thankfully during the day the managers are around to catch the slackers but it happens, I suppose.
I found out today that someone has paid one of my restaurant bills. I took Bryan out to eat at a restaurant and paid for a delicious pizza and pretzels, and I found out that it has been struck from the record for one reason or another, freeing up some money for other things. This definitely must be a God thing, cause I was shocked to see my bank account at the number it was.
Yes, I have been corrupted and have been seeking God more. Normally my spiritual mind is like a 5-year-old on a playground, going from one thing to the next without being interested in any one thing in particular. Save the really hardcore conservative and nature religions, I've probably tried it at least once.
I still don't like churches. When I was in college I got kicked out of a college ministry for being a bit of a dingbat and I have never quite forgotten that yucky feeling. Besides, to me it seems like churches are hotbeds for cliques and exclusivity. Nevertheless, I have been enjoying praying and watching Joyce Meyer on TV, and I hope eventually something will come of it. But in the meantime I am living in the moment.
I hope everyone has a good day. Mine is off to a good start already. :)
-S
I can't believe that I am almost down 15 pounds since starting the BMR Bliss Pack. I am very glad to have some weight off, even though most of it has been just from not eating and working all day. I definitely love my job 99.99 percent of the time but sometimes it just gets on my nerves, lol. Last night was interesting because there were only two of us and my co-worker was off hiding somewhere and there was often a 5-or-6 customer line. Thankfully during the day the managers are around to catch the slackers but it happens, I suppose.
I found out today that someone has paid one of my restaurant bills. I took Bryan out to eat at a restaurant and paid for a delicious pizza and pretzels, and I found out that it has been struck from the record for one reason or another, freeing up some money for other things. This definitely must be a God thing, cause I was shocked to see my bank account at the number it was.
Yes, I have been corrupted and have been seeking God more. Normally my spiritual mind is like a 5-year-old on a playground, going from one thing to the next without being interested in any one thing in particular. Save the really hardcore conservative and nature religions, I've probably tried it at least once.
I still don't like churches. When I was in college I got kicked out of a college ministry for being a bit of a dingbat and I have never quite forgotten that yucky feeling. Besides, to me it seems like churches are hotbeds for cliques and exclusivity. Nevertheless, I have been enjoying praying and watching Joyce Meyer on TV, and I hope eventually something will come of it. But in the meantime I am living in the moment.
I hope everyone has a good day. Mine is off to a good start already. :)
-S
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