It's amazing how you find yourself when you lose weight.
I have found by losing weight I have suddenly felt like I should not ever, EVER settle and I have been telling people I know that, probably to the point of annoyance at times. :-D But there is a story behind my obsessive use of the phrase "Never settle," and I feel like I have reached a point in my life where I feel comfortable sharing a little bit more of myself.
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My weight has only been an issue for me since I was 14. Before that, I was as active as could be. I was a moderately accomplished gymnast and tried to be a cheerleader until a self-confidence and knee blowout ended that venture. :-) I also ice skated and played soccer, basketball, and softball. I was never good, but I loved it.
I don't want to get into the particulars of my childhood, but there were some issues that caused me to gain weight. I ended up putting on over 100 lbs in a short amount of time.
I finally got to the breaking point the first time when I hit 240. At 5'3" (fun sized!) that was a hard pill to swallow and my body was showing the effects. I lost 51 lbs, getting down to 189, but I gained it all back after ending an abusive relationship with an ex-boyfriend. It was very hard for me, as was the death of my maternal grandma, and I'm just now emptying the last piece of that emotional baggage.
I went to see a psychiatrist for occasional depression and panic attacks, and found out I had residual post-traumatic stress disorder from that relationship. He seemed to think I had daddy issues (I do, my dad is way too awesome! It's killing me! :-D) and tried to get me out of my parents' house. I moved way too fast, found a job where I got scammed and lost over $2000, and it pretty much imploded. I'm still unpacking those bags.
So, all that culminated into a very frustrating time of it. I became moderately depressed, and one day I went to the library hoping to find the latest book to change my life (aren't we all guilty of this from time to time, lol?) and found out that the answer was in my lap. I had my BMR Bliss meds and needed to take them for the day. I had reached into the passenger seat to grab the bottle and it said in pretty font, "Never Settle."
Suddenly, I realized that was what I had been doing my whole life. I had been settling into everyone's mold of me, I let everyone push me around, I didn't take care of myself, and I had just been settling. Now was the time to change. I pulled into the gym on the way home and the rest is history. :-)
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I hope that gives you a better understanding of what I've been through. I really hope that I can encourage you to do the same. Well, maybe not with the roller coaster of emotions it took me to get there, but I want to encourage you to never settle for less than what you're worth. Don't let anyone tell you negative things about you. You were put on this Earth for a reason, and that was not to give up! :-)
I hope this has encouraged you tonight. I hope you have a great evening.
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